Here are some thoughts from Mr. Francesco Basile.
And, to go further, you can also get the book by Philippe Lévy published by Le Souffle d’Or: Decode your sexuality. In the animal world, sexual relations are a form of natural selection: only the dominant one (the one who is the strongest, guarantor of quality DNA, that is to say prepared for any test of survival) has the right to sexuality. This is how a woman sexually desires a man if, in her representation, he is dominant (in his social role; example: business manager, film actor, sports champion, etc.).
If, in her representation, the man comes down from the pedestal and disappoints her, she may no longer feel sexual desire, but only tenderness of a friendly nature. There are many examples of women who no longer have desire for their partner, but as soon as this partner becomes interested in another female (which for the brain is decoded as dominant behavior), their desire returns. more beautiful.
If a female becomes dominant, she will behave like a seductive male and will move with initiative towards the dominated males, but her offspring can then be in danger because in nature the dominant can eliminate the young.
“I’m afraid of losing control. » “If I give in to the sensations of pleasure, I am in danger. » “I have pleasure, but I can’t have an orgasm,” some women complain.
Orgasm is like sleep: the more we look for it, the less we find it, the less we let it come. Orgasm involves complete relaxation. Here, this relaxation is impossible: there is a conflict in the body:
– relaxation is dangerous,
– loss of control is dangerous,
– pleasure is guilty.
In the event of excruciating suffering during childhood, the body goes to sleep, because: “The closer I am to life, the closer I am to death.” In milder cases of anorgasmia or even the need for alcohol to achieve orgasm, we sometimes find a conflict of shame (in relation to the other).
Impotence, sexual dysfunction
This is typically dominated syndrome. Fear opens the blood vessels, the erection is an influx of blood into a corpus cavernosum. But at some point, the blood outlet vessels must contract to prevent reflux and allow an erection. In this situation, the man is afraid of his wife, he is submissive. Fear of hurting her, of being violent, of hurting her, etc. Added to this is sexual devaluation: “I am no longer capable of satisfying her…”
The man who is too mental, who is in his head rather than in his body, has less sensation in the penis and the erection does not last. The man, normally, controls his ejaculation by a transition from excitement to relaxation.
Loss of sexual territory and separation conflict.
The sexual muscle becomes powerful by the arrival of blood. Sympathicotonia, stress inhibits arterial dilation. The sexual act caused territorial problems. The man feels rejected, failed by his wife. “I’m afraid of women. » Man in the eraser, self-effacement; he feels attacked by the feminine. This can cause penile anesthesia, with loss of penile sensitivity.
Conflict of sexual impotence in relation to the overly powerful father.
“My father blocks me. »
“I am separated from the woman (the feminine, my mother, etc.) and attacked by the man (the masculine, the father). » It’s “quick – quick”, the urgency before the dominant one arrives. “You have to act quickly so as not to be surprised. » “I’m afraid of making my mother suffer. »
According to Josy Kromer, it is the conflict of the third deer: a man fears being left by his partner. It is the deer who quickly impregnates a doe while two other deer are fighting. “I feel dominated, I have no right to make love. »
Making love on the sly. Stress, emotion (danger memory). Who is the dominant male? Who is the woman thinking of, has she mourned the previous one? “I can’t have sex because I’m under great stress. ” ” I do not have the right. »
Conflict of the bull calf who cannot catch the big female.
Permanent reactivation of the devaluation of the sexual act (self-programming).